Thursday, February 9, 2012

REAL Love Series: Obey and Enjoy - A guy's take

I particularly love when a guy could share some light on the topic of courtship. Here's a great one from "the guy" at

“Do not awaken or arouse love until it so desires.” That was the word from the Lord. That was all I had to stand by. I had no idea that God was going to take me on a journey that would change my life.

Can I just say that I wasn’t looking to date? I wasn’t looking for a wife. But when I saw her, I knew. The attraction was something deeper then the skin, but shallower than the spiritual. I quickly became the guy who liked the girl with the smile. I made a covenant with the Lord that I would not introduce myself to this beauty, but that He would introduce us if it was His will. It was. We met, through a friend, two weeks later. What conspired after wasn’t so great. It went something like this: guy expresses feelings prematurely, girl freaks out, girl comes back, feelings are exchanged and fireworks happen, God says not yet, they choose to obey, guy falls out of attraction, girl runs away from attraction, and all seems lost. That ridiculously long run-on sentence covered about 8 months.

Lo and behold, the Lord was in control the whole time. I don’t think we ever fell fully out of attraction for one another, I think we just gave up on the Lord. As we “moved on” we moved into a true best friend relationship. God began stirring in my heart an attraction for her like the one I originally had, but I didn’t want to ruin the great friendship that was being birthed. I asked God to take control of my passions; He did. Then on December 6th, 2010 God whispered in my ear, “it’s time.” I knew what He was talking about, and I really didn’t want to go there. He was talking about the beginning of a courtship.

On December 10th, 2010 I asked for her hand in courtship. We began our courtship that day. There are not many rules for us. The words “I love you” and the physical seal of a kiss will be reserved for our engagement season, which is when our love will be proved. Right now I am thoroughly enjoying this dating season. It is filled with late night chats, frequent texts, and snail mail letters. Our dates are never conventional; we like to be creative in all aspects.

I would love to say that there is a “right way” to doing a courtship, but there really isn’t. It’s about seeking the face of God and watching Him do everything. All we are required to do is obey and enjoy. Please allow me, though, to shed some words of wisdom. Girls: DO NOT do the pursuing. Wait on that boy, and when he is ready he will MAN UP and purse you. Keep your eyes on the Lord, as He is your groom during your single season. Guys: Don’t rush into a pursuit just because your feelings tell you too. Step back for a second and see what God thinks of it. Lastly, if your not ready to get married one to two years after you begin courting, then you are not ready to be courting at all… justsayin.

Such wisdom in this post. Thank you!!
By the way, tomorrow we'll read on her side of the story and learn more about courtship. 

PS: Giveaway is still open.


  1. Such awesome insight all this week! I'm excited for what else is to come. :)

    1. Yes I agree. The series has exceeded my expectations and each post has been a huge blessing!

  2. I love his intake on the topic. Specially the last line "if you're not ready to get married in one to two years after beginning your courtship, then you're not ready to begin courting at all" --on the other hand, a part of me believes there can be exceptions to the rule when circumstances out of one's control don't allow marriage in that time frame. I am not referring to economical or emotional factors. For example: women who date guys in the military have to face deployments and are the exemption to the rule. In any other cases, I agree with the two year rule and every other word in this post.

    Can't wait to read her side of the story.

    1. Ana you are right there are exceptions and I believe thats why he mentions that there is no right way or standard for a courtship. What I believe is that courtship has some basic princies to follow though. When one enters into a courtship is for the purpose of defining if the other person will be your spouse. So I think he is saying that you are entering the commitment of courtship with that mentality... Marriage.

      Thanks for your comment xoxo

    2. I agree with you too. There are plenty of exceptions. The time frame is more of a guidelines. In my opinion, and as Christians, we must have a healthy perspective of marriage if we begin to court. By that, just an idea of when you will be available for marriage (with parents permission, excluding other factors)

  3. This is beautiful. It's funny, because I knew exactly who "the girl" was as soon as he mentioned her! :)


thank you for your lovely comments & check back for response!