Friday, February 10, 2012

REAL Love Series: Waiting is About God, Not Each Other

This post from the girl with a smile is so good, it needs no introduction. Enjoy!

This guy and I are courting. It's one of the best things that's ever happened to me. But a lot happened before we got here.

Let's rewind, shall we?

"God, give me the patience to hold on. I want to not grow tired or rebellious about you writing my love story." - Nov. 17, 2009 {journal entry}

Let me give you the context of when I wrote this. I had been enjoying a season of God pursuing me as the Lover of my soul like never before. And in this pursuit of Him breaking the walls that calloused my heart, I was required to let love in. A total healing process of letting go of the false idea I had of love, relationships and marriage. 3 months prior  to this entry, I had made a covenant with the Lord that I would not date for a year, even if He brought the right guy into my life (this is really how His pursuit for my soul began). And when I made this covenant, I thought I would not be tempted to break it because I didn't have any guy catch my attention (and I wasn't expecting it to...) but there I was, desperately asking the Lord for strength to wait, just 3 months after!! The impossible had happened: I was wanting to date this godly guy that had caught my attention with his walk with the Lord. The pressure was on.

I was waiting for the Lord to reveal if this would be the guy or not, an answer he would not give me without faith on my part. So I waited... I wanted God's will more than my own. I did not want to 'make' this guy the one for me. I guarded my heart as I waited: I didn't tell him things that were personal to me, or the hurts from the past. I told myself that I wouldn't tell him things I would not tell someone else on the same friendship level just because my emotions told me to. God was capable of orchestrating our story without my help or his. I could rest on that. Ironically, through this waiting season I was being prepared for the next season. The foundation for our relationship was being laid. I could expect our relationship to bear good fruits just because good fruit was bearing through our friendship season. We grown alongside each other and God has been and will always be our common ground! Waiting had to be about God, not each other. It is to glorify Him, not the sake of just dating someone.

There were things God was going to be clear about in the waiting season:
  1. The only relationship that matters the most for eternity is the one with our Creator.
  2. Was I being called to marriage? - In our Western Culture Christianity, we seem to put extra emphasis on the idea of romance, marriage & family. Rightfully so, since it's the core of God's plan for us. But we take it to the extreme sometimes and we tend to look down & dismiss the importance of singlehood, whether temporary or not.
  3. I didn't want to date/court (I like to call it 'intentional dating') if I wasn't putting marriage on a healthy perspective. The idea that this guy friend was someone's future husband helped me respect him and our boundaries. And until we're not saying "I do" on an altar to each other, I am still being grounded on that statement. He is not mine.
  4. The single season prepares you for courting & engagement seasons. If you're not content with the gift of singlehood, you will not be content in marriage. No matter how much you disagree with this, it's true.
  5. Love is not self-seeking. Many times did L & I endure the worst of each other, and we thought to give up on our friendship. Love serves and sacrifices, even when being despised. You cannot want a relationship for you gain from it, but for what you give to it.
  6. Real love, true love, does exist. It all depends if you're willing to trust God with that area of your life, even if it involves being single & devoted to Him all your life. Amy Carmichael was a godly woman who never married but glorified Christ with all her life.
  7. God can orchestrate your love story because He cares about it more than you do. After all, He designed it! It's the closest thing we have that speaks of His relationship with us. He calls us His bride (Revelation 21:2). Trust that He will not let you be single a day more than you need to be.
Dear ladies,
Just wait upon the Lord. We were friends for two years and I had not seen my guy friend for 6 months before he showed up to my door, asking permission to court me.
This quote has been my motto ever since:

"I will trust while I wait for my God i never late"

This post was amazing. Thank you so much for joining me on this! Please visit her blog for more tips on Christian living and courtship - She Smiles, She Writes

PS: A few more days left on the Giveaway!


  1. I'm coming from over over at She smiles, She writes.

    I really like that you are doing this series! I went back and read all of the posts that are part of the series and thought that they were really encouraging.

    I'm in the midst of the early stages of a courtship. The posts were good reminders and good food for thought as I'm on this new life adventure.

    Nice to find your blog!

    1. Thank you Sara! I'm glad that the posts have been of encouragement to you.

      Thanks for stopping by :)

  2. Beautiful story, girl! Waiting on the Lord can be so so hard.. but totally worth it! Thanks for sharing, Ashley! :)

  3. Sooo amazing and beautiful!! Trust in God like that is rare these days. It's so inspiring!!
    Thanks for sharing <3

  4. #2 & #4 are my favorite. Oh Jennifer, this series is lovely.

  5. Sooo sweet, what a great video! Thank you really much for sharing that with us!!

  6. how beautiful! thanks so much for sharing! xo



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