Thursday, June 16, 2011

no one said it would be easy

everyday i strive to be more like Christ, my savior.
it's not always and easy job. and i dont always succeed.
lately, ive made some radical decisions about surrender.
i want to be completely His.
but, i as i walk towards that goal and through the process of letting go my own desires and letting his plan unravel, i often get sidetrack by distractors.
some times i get negative feedback.
whether it be from my mind, my own weaknesses, my attitudes, my flesh, the enemy.
they all combine against my efforts.
and even what i think those around me feel.
but i reckon {btw, i dont think ive ever used this word before}
and i decide to deny their claims. and even though they may be right.
even though my attitudes may not always line up to my statuses or posts about:

letting go
surrender to christ
completely in love with christ
seek him all your days
trust the lord
be humble
be kind
be loving
act like jesus
read radical
i will continue to do it. i will continue forward.
because a lot of the times, those post, statuses or what not, are just my way of having faith in me.
if i dont have faith in Christ at work in me,
than i might as well have no faith at all.
so my declaring of those desires publicly, may put me to scrutiny
and allow for expectations from those who read.
but what's the gospel about if not forgiveness, love and mercy.
yes, i fight to be better.
and i fail at it a lot.
but i keep fighting.
and one day... i'll get there.
and new battles will arise.
this walk is uphill, hard and continuous until he comes or takes me with him.


  1. beautiful. it's a hard journey, that's for sure. but no journey is more perfectly worth it. in every sense of the word. it's that striving that keeps us holy. that pushing that keeps us pure. have a beautiful day.

  2. i'm learning this, too. i've realized that i get confused when i let what other people may think or say get to me and forget about God's promises for my life. i forget that He's all I need and that it's what He says that matters. i love this post, this blog, you! pray God continues to pour His grace over you. you're special, Jenny!
    i dedicate this to you:

  3. thank you ladies for the encouragement!

  4. wow. i just came across your blog and i can't stop reading! you're a beautiful writer!!

  5. You are right, it is uphill somedays, and more times than not we will fall short, but what matters is to keep running, and keep going. You have such a beautiful heart. P.S. Thanks for the heads up that the cd is on Itunes-going to buy it tonight. :)


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